Mar-a-Lago, FL – Fresh off his “victory” in renaming the Gulf of Mexico to the Gulf of America (for approximately five minutes), President Donald Trump has now set his sights on an even bigger prize: renaming the White House to ‘Trump House’.
Speaking to supporters at a rally, Trump declared:
“The White House? Boring name. Very weak, very generic. Look, everyone knows that I made the White House more successful than any president before me. They should call it Trump House—it’s only fair! We had the best economy, the best walls, the best McDonald’s delivery service in history. Obama? Please. He didn’t even put gold trim in the Oval Office!”
Congress Reacts (Sort Of)
While legal experts pointed out that the White House has been called ‘The White House’ since 1901, Trump dismissed this as “fake history,” stating that it was originally named Trump Manor but that “Sleepy Joe and the deep state” erased the records.
“It’s the greatest house in the world, folks. But let’s be honest, it was missing one thing—my name. Trump House. Sounds beautiful, doesn’t it?”
Other Places on Trump’s Rename List
In what insiders are calling ‘The Great Rebranding,’ Trump is also reportedly pushing for the following changes:
- Mount Rushmore → Mount Trumpmore (“Why have four guys when you can have one perfect face?”)
- The Pentagon → The Trumptagon (“Five sides? I’d make it ten. Double the power.”)
- The Grand Canyon → Trump’s Big Beautiful Canyon (“I don’t know who made it, but I assume it was me.”)
- The Statue of Liberty → Lady Trumpety (“She needs a little makeover, maybe some gold plating.”)
At press time, Google Maps employees were seen guarding the servers to prevent any further name changes.